I cannot believe how time has flown.
Many have asked me about my house and I can honestly say I still love it.
Still so overwhelmed by all the many of you who have given so generously to me.
never have I felt so supported.
And boy have I needed it.
real quick here is the latest upgrade on this ever changing home:
and then it started to change
I think this has been one of my favorite things to see.
And now on the inside it is not just me living in its depths.
I have a foster daughter.
this thing I have wanted to do from the time I was a young teen, i am now living.
And. it. is. the. HARDEST. thing I have ever done.
I read back through my last post which I wrote months before I had any kids and I am convinced God was trying to prepare me. If only I had been listening to myself.
I read this fantastic article about God giving us more than we can handle so we turn to Him for our support. I seem to have forgotten this these last 8 weeks. Instead I have been just whining and bemoaning the struggles I am now facing.
I need a knock on the head like those V-8 commercials.
Found this quote again today:
“Sometimes I don’t want to follow Jesus. When I get really honest with myself, the last thing I want to do is step out of my carefully constructed boat which I think will keep me safe, loved, secure, worthy and important to at least some people.
And yet, stepping out of the boat and letting go of fear is the Way of Jesus. Why? Because doing so gives us incredible freedom and power. It’s extremely strong medicine.” -Ted Dekker
This has been me lately. not wanting to follow what Jesus has called me to.
Recently I was yelling at God, asking Him why sacrifice has to be so HARD.
Anyone feel me?
And yet when I look at the positive side of this life I am in right now I find so many things that I have been trying to do for so long have happened.
I am consistently having my quiet time with Jesus. Because now more than ever I realize how very much I need Him every day.
I am eating healthy. (mostly because I can’t keep much down-read stress induced indigestion)
side note: I love this:
I’m also learning so much about patience.
It’s super fun.
So this is just me being honest.
Life happens. It is messy. It is hard. It is meant for us to glorify God
I have failed in doing this. because I have been focusing on the struggle. On how much I am not having fun. Instead of looking for how I can be giving Jesus the credit He deserves.
Learn from me people. Give it to Him, so much easier than carrying it all.
“You might be shrunken with sadness or drowning in debt. You might be overwhelmingly angry at someone at church or aching under the pressures of raising children or maybe the inability to have them. You might be dealing with a terminal disease and you still have young children. And chances are–you might need your Redeemer to find you on the path and take up that heavy cross you’re dragging. Besides, even he tells us that he’s more equipped to carry it, so why not hand it over?
I’ve come to learn–slowly but surely–why I need Him.” Great article
And through it all He carries us.